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When I finally did feel comfortable to post a (faraway and sunglassed) photo on my AM profile, I was bombarded with likes and winks and invitations to view private photo galleries. I finally chatted with someone I found interesting. We had excellent Internet chemistry, banter that gave me butterflies – only then did I start to entertain the reality of an in-person meeting. But I felt little bursts of dopamine activate my neurons during our online chats when I should have been working, playing a game with my son, or going to bed on time. But when I did go ahead and sleep with another man and confessed the tryst to my husband, he told me in no uncertain terms that the “open marriage” was off the table. But for me, it’s not about a secret kink, an insatiable sexual appetite. I shared things that I seldom discuss with even my closest friends. We stayed up late chatting, and he often made me laugh out loud.

As soon as I conceded that I would meet with him at a restaurant midway between his work and my house, I also resolved to meet with a total of five other men. I complied, but then secretly embarked on a more prolonged affair with a local man I met online. My husband was hurt, horrified and needed time to reevaluate our relationship. In reflecting on my proclivity for infidelity, I can only describe it as a kind of sensation seeking — the addictive quality of falling for someone new — and a propensity for self-destruction — reinforcing pathological defense mechanisms. He’s married to his college sweetheart, and his wife became pregnant with their third child over the course of our friendship.

This variety includes Blondes, Blacks, BBW’s, Emos, Lesbians, Latinas, Asians, Brunettes, Bisexuals, Dominatrix and more!

With life pulling us left, right and sideways, it’s no wonder smartphones have become the ultimate human sidekicks, making our lives easier in so many ways.

Having been unfaithful to my (handsome, hilarious and very nearly perfect) husband in the past, I was familiar with the buzz of infidelity, and I wanted to get high again. Or, most horrifyingly, by my father (he was never on the website that I know of, but this remained my most prominent and irrational fear). I’m in my 30’s, enjoy my profession, love my adorable family. My favorite book is Kesey’s One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, my favorite movie is Steel Magnolias, and my favorite band is The Grateful Dead.”I surfed the profiles of men I never doubted to be real.

I’d read about the Ashley Madison website in a magazine article a year or two before, filing the data away for potential future use. Skeptical, I provided very little identifying information on my profile at registration. The personal details I did eventually include were guarded and vanilla. I looked for handsome faces, some semblance of professional success, and proper grammar/punctuation.

Not long after, I looked online to see what the website purported to deliver. I wanted to hunt without being hunted, and was afraid I’d be found out. It wasn’t quite like shopping for shoes at Nordstrom, where everything is beautifully displayed and screams “Buy me! ” — but the selection was certainly better than the Goodwill thrift shop down the road.

The word Sexting is a combination of sex and texting and it can be lots of fun when practiced with respect and consent.

For instance, if I tell you I want to push you against the wall and strip off your clothes (in a sweet/sexy way), I’m definitely sexting.




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