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There seems to be two types of people when it comes to dating in midlife: those who are the proverbial kid having fun while looking for the pony in the pile of …well you know what, and those who consider it a necessary evil to be avoided, sometimes at all costs.They're clear, satisfying, and let me get every idea or task out in one place to visualize. He will be a fully realized, independent, emotionally intact, whole person. He will have close male friends, some since childhood. His best qualities will include empathy, compassion, passion and integrity. He must be a spectacularly devoted, present, active, fully-engaged father. He will love me deeply, unconditionally, with his entire being, AS I AM RIGHT NOW. He will expect and want an active, vibrant, open, playful, imaginative and intimate physical life together.He will be grateful and aware that I am a fully realized, independent, emotionally intact, whole person. He will surround himself with people who challenge him, not who simply affirm him. He will love my daughter unconditionally and understand from the start that I will always choose her. He will understand and have deep, non-judgmental empathy for my enduring and relentless grief over the loss of my brother. He will have a complicated but strong relationship with his mother.Knowledge and planning are your best ammunition for success.Regardless of your past, and truly see everything ... it is filled with all sorts of new experiences (some good, some frustrating). We (your fellow midlife brothers) are here to help.

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