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There is a myth—an urban legend really—among many dating individuals today that goes like this: If I date him (or her) and it doesn’t work out, it will be awkward in our social scene. It’s kept women from showing interest or saying yes to certain men asking them on a date.And dare I say, its perhaps delayed or even prevented some “happily ever afters.” My friends’ wedding, and the attendance of their exes, proves this myth to be just that.Her take: “I went out with a guy I met online who seemed really sweet and charming. A few days later, he texts me to say that he isn't looking for a girlfriend—just casual sex.I felt cheated and hurt.” -Andrea C., 31Expert take: Even if a guy doesn’t say straight out in his profile that he’s only looking for hook-ups, some will offer hints.You’re left wondering what went wrong and analyzing (and reanalyzing and reanalyzing) things with your friends. While we’ll never be able to fully understand guys (and we probably wouldn’t want to), you can learn from these moments.We found 10 women in your situation and asked experts to give their insights on what happened so you can dodge future dating disasters.

1) Be Independent Some “experts” say you should act unavailable.

Like a fuck buddy or booty call, the relationship is mostly based on sex.

However, it usually isn’t just about sex like a pickup is.

If the date feels like a hook-up, that’s probably what he’s seeking.

To be sure you don’t give the wrong impression, “set a date for the future, and make it the right time of day and place so the intention of getting to know each other is there in the beginning,” recommends Ian Kerner, Ph.

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You think you desire something serious with this particular guy—but before you do anything else, be sure. Bottom line: Be in a relationship where you feel good when you're without him, but you feel even better with him. 1 piece of advice is to never to bring up the "What are we? "It's like going to a party, turning off the music, turning on the lights, and asking, 'Are we all having a good time here? "A good relationship is built on momentum, and putting a stop to the fun to 'check in' is a surefire way to kill the romance."Let things progress naturally and look at the evidence: Does he try to see you whenever he's free?

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